Group highlights needs of children in military families

Saturday, March 17, 2007 11:38 PM CDT

Breakout

Operation: Military Kids, aims to help students in grades 4 through 12 cope with the social, emotional, and educational issues surrounding the long-term absence of one or both parents serving in the military.

The program is open to children of active military personnel living in Kenosha or Racine counties, who can commit to 85 percent program attendance. Enrollment is limited to 50 children.

For more information, call Mary Day at (262) 595-2550 or (262) 595-2176, or contact her at mary.day@uwp.edu.

Group highlights needs of children in military families

By Paul Sloth

Journal Times

SOMERS - Kiyana Mills keeps her father Keith's Navy jacket, complete with patches from the places he traveled, during his time in the service. The jacket reminds her of all the time her father spent away from home, away from his children.

Those were difficult times for Kiyana, 17, a junior at Kenosha Tremper High School.

It was part of life, but every time he left, it took time to readjust.

"He would always say he had to go to duty and I would ask, 'What is duty?' " Kiyana said. "I used to hate when he said it, because I knew it meant he had to leave."

Kiyana spent Saturday with a group of children who are currently going through what she went through when she was younger - living with a military parent. It was the first meeting of Operation: Military Kids, a special support group for children whose parents serve in the military. The group spent Saturday at the University of Wisconsin-Parkside, getting to know each other so that, down the road, they'll be able to support each other if, and when, their parents deploy.

Mary Day, UW-Parkside's pre-college program director, said the group will meet monthly and program activities will include college visits, career exploration and developing a student's personal portfolio. She's working with members of Leadership Racine to get the project up and running.

It's an effort that hits close to home for Day, who lives in Racine. Her son, Kenny Day, wanted to make sure she found a place for his two sons, Kurtis and Keon, both students at Racine's Roosevelt Elementary School.

Kurtis, 8, is proud of his dad, Kenny, who served in the Navy. He said he wants to someday serve his country, too.

They were the inspiration for Mary Day to start the program at Parkside.

"We've got to give back," she said.

Organizers also are planning other activities, including a Milwaukee Brewers game, summer camp and a military ball.

The group is just what Susana Coffman was looking for. The Kenosha mother of four has been looking for a place where her children can meet other children of military families, which can be hard when families move around often.

Coffman's husband, Michael, is stationed at Great Lakes Naval Station in Great Lakes, Ill. He has been deployed before to Kuwait and could head to Iraq soon. His absence from home makes it difficult at times for his wife and children.

"It's nice to know that somebody cares," said Susana, who attended Saturday's event with two of her children, Michael and Priscilla. "Sometimes you feel overlooked."

Besides feeling overlooked, military families, especially those in Wisconsin who usually live far from any military base, often don't have the kind of support they need while awaiting a loved one's return, which is one of the reasons Sue Curtis helped start one of the state's first Operation: Military Kids groups at UW-Platteville, where she works.

"One of the things I've learned in talking with families was that (saying goodbye) is not the hardest part. It's the day-to-day wondering about if your parent is all right," Curtis said. "We knew we wanted to do something, but we didn't know what to do."

She worked with the National Guard to start the group in Platteville. She also learned recently that Wisconsin would become an official Operation: Military Kids state.

Curtis said the program is perfect for a state like Wisconsin, where military personnel are considered "suddenly military" because they serve in the Reserves and National Guard.

Military bases have many support opportunities, but it can be harder for families like the Coffmans.

"If we don't have some positive opportunities, there could be some long-term negative consequences," Curtis said.

Kiyana Mills understands the difficulty of saying goodbye, and the uncertainty of a parent who is off serving their country in another part of the world.

Keith Mills is retired now, but he was deployed nine of the 20 years he served in the Navy, to various parts of the world. He's glad to see a local group working to provide this kind of support to children who are experiencing the same things his children did.

Things are different for her younger brother, Khalil.

"I feel better for him because he doesn't have to go through what we went through," Kiyana said. "He loves to be around my dad."

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